3 months post Facebook

It’s ten days short of three months since I posted anything on Facebook. I also turned all alerts off on my phone for pages, Facebook and messenger. Why? Here’s why, along with what I have found. 

  • External comments that I always seemed to be on my phone rather than paying attention to what’s happening here and now.
  • Extracting the stress: I read somewhere that the best way to look after yourself and reduce stress was to ‘stop consuming’ on social media.

When I posted my last comment on 31 December. 2016, it was met with a lot of shock reactions. People asking was I ok? Yep, just fine. They didn’t seem to think life could operate without Facebook.

Here’s what I have learned.

No one actually gives a damn.

Not a single ‘friend’ on Facebook has contacted me through some other means during the time I have been off Facebook.

What I’m taking from that is that Facebook is simply a convenient ‘window’ into other people’s lives. Scroll scroll scroll, like glancing at a newspaper, then move on. Nothing much more.

Around a month ago, I started going back on to Facebook very occasionally just to see what was most recently posted. It now very much feels like the school playground when I was a child. You would shout something out, not necessarily talking to anyone but just to get a reaction. Facebook really feels like that.

Around a month ago, I accidentally posted one item. Simply because I had forgotten to unlink another social media platform. I only found out when I logged in on my computer to manage my business page and an alert popped up. Suddenly I found myself looking to see if anyone had seen it, liked it or commented on it. Consequently I quickly deleted it again. What was happening to me? I don’t really actually give a damn about that stuff, so what was facebook doing to me?!

I have been wondering to myself how long I’ll keep my silence up for. But then I look at my account and think – what would I actually want to say anyway? Suddenly what you communicate to the world takes on a different importance.

TODAY is what’s important

It’s no longer important to live your life like you’re in a goldfish bowl.

It’s no longer important whether anyone saw, liked or commented on your post.

What is important is now. Today. Here. In the present moment.

You’re here, not there, don’t kid yourself. 

To begin with, Facebook felt like a lifeline to the life I had left behind in the Northern Hemisphere. But time goes on. That’s no longer my life. This HERE is my life.

Yes, it’s good to stay in contact with friends around the world, but I do find it quite frustrating that so many people see Facebook as the only way to do that.

There was only one person in England (apart from my Dad who still calls me regularly) who contacted me during these three months. She isn’t on Facebook and has never been on Facebook. What does that tell you?

Life is far to short to be living in some electronic universe. Life is real. It’s here all around you. Be present and don’t waste any more time.

About Melanie Ryding

I am a personal trainer, triathlon coach, body and mind set coach and nutritionist. I can help you to unlock your full potential!
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